


Greg Lestrade's Five Most Recent Google Searches (or, How Greg Uses His Work Computer For Everything But Work).

by orphan_account



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen, Greg's adventures on Google, M/M, Things what I wrote in the early hours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-13
Updated: 2013-08-13
Packaged: 2017-12-23 09:03:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/924503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on an online diary prompt that suggested I wrote about what I most recently searched on the Internet, and whether said searches were successful. </p><p>Since my most recent Google searches were largely suspicious when collected together, I decided to speculate upon what I think Greg might use Google for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Greg Lestrade's Five Most Recent Google Searches (or, How Greg Uses His Work Computer For Everything But Work).

1\. ‘Gregory Lestrade’  
He doesn’t know if he should include this one, because he immediately deletes it from his internet history. After all, who actually admits to googling themselves? But it’s habit now, and though he never expects to see anything new, it’s always the first thing he does when he logs on to his computer at the beginning of a shift. A quick glance over the first page shows the usual results. A few pictures of him, then a link to a YouTube video made by some little shit who thought they were being funny. Don’t Commit Suicide: the autotune remix. It’s almost a point of pride for him that the fifty four second clip had over five thousand views (and counting). A couple of Daily Mail articles from last month’s high profile murders come next, but that case is closed. LinkedIn follows, though he’s never made a profile, then a few online directory pages and lastly the Twitter account of someone who just happened to share his name.   
He gets no mentions today, and he’s relieved. It means he’s doing his job.

2\. ‘feeling thirsty all the time’  
For somebody who is so reluctant to go to the doctors, he can be a bit of a hypochondriac. He’s seen his GP twice in the past five years; once to get a suspicious mole removed and then again four weeks later for the doctor to confirm that it had been entirely innocent, a perfectly normal mole. Both visits had been at Mycroft’s insistence. Despite this, he googles his symptoms at least once a week, so when he notices he’s making his fourth trip to the water cooler in the space of one morning, he decides to consult the internet. He ends up on WebMD, sipping at his water as he highlights his symptoms. Now they mention it, he has had a bit of joint pain. And, yes, he was tired a lot. He did get the odd headache, too. The results are in. Diabetes, multiple sclerosis or short sightedness.   
He doesn’t much fancy any of those, so he closes the window and puts it down to getting old.

3\. ‘Peter Capaldi’  
At lunch, the conversation turns to the big news of the week and he finds himself discussing Doctor Who with Euan and Gary from Traffic. There’s a bit of a debate, probably a bit too lively to be at home in the canteen of New Scotland Yard, but they’re all in agreement. Yeah, he’ll be a good Doctor, they all say. They’re glad it’s someone older, someone a bit different, someone they know already. What else has he been in, they ask, and then they wonder how they coped without smartphones as Greg pulls up the Wikipedia page.  
One thing leads to another, and by the end of lunch Greg is on eBay ordering a Malcolm Tucker tea towel.

4\. ‘WebMD’  
He goes back to the symptom checker straight after lunch. He has indigestion and he wonders if it could be linked. He’s procrastinating, really; he’s not taking the results seriously. Heart attack is one of the site’s suggestions this time, and he laughs to himself. It’s reassuring, he decides, scrolling through the list of possible diagnoses and knowing they don’t apply to him.  
Compared to the faceless man on his computer screen, he was as fit as a fiddle.

5\. ‘Dictionary.com’  
He sends a text to Mycroft on his break, then sends another ten minutes later after receiving no reply. They’re not important messages, but he’s used to immediate replies from his partner. He sends four texts in total; a ‘how’s your day’, two bad jokes and an ‘I love you’. He’s particularly disappointed that the last one doesn’t get a reply. It’s another two hours before his phone buzzes. “Apologies for my tardy response. An afternoon in the House of Lords has left me irascible. M”. He has to look it up.  
i·ras·ci·ble (adj) Very irritable. Synonyms: testy, short-tempered. A few minutes later: “I love you too. M”. He doesn’t need the dictionary for that.


End file.
